Honest Poem

1. My name is Nick, I have a middle name that starts with an 'R' , but something about having it said out loud makes me feel like I have an identity crisis.

2. I say a lot about nothing, but I swear the way I say it always makes it sound like something.

3. When I was between the ages of 5 & 13 I knew the lines of my smile by heart... Nowadays they take a few minutes to rehearse.

4. I don't like the idea of getting weighed, but only because I'm polite. See I know that between the burdens of my soul, my thoughts and my intellect ... It would be far too heavy for a simple scale to comprehend. Putting that much pressure on it would be rude.

5. Old school Hip Hop always makes me feel like I was born a decade too late, like I missed the "Soul Train" , caught the commercial & got off at the wrong station.

6. Sometimes I feel like an Orthophoto amongst Topographics, like I'm the only one without signs of convention...but then again we're all just maps, failing to see past each others' physical boundaries.

7. My friends to me are like Velcro shoe straps to a 10 year old on their first pair of Nike sneakers. They never get old , I can't get over how they seem to enhance the swag in my step & they're always there to hold me down no matter how much I mess with them.

8. All broken things intimidate me, they never have the audacity to break the same way and I must say that their originality always makes me feel a little unworthy.

9. My fingers are sore from trying to touch people's souls.

10. I learnt to tie my heart strings before my laces, every now and again I suffocate.

11. Finding myself often feels a lot like looking for Waldo in the dark with my eyes closed.

12. My heart is like an old dog, you can't teach it anything new.

13. I swear the heavens were trying to test my patience, like me, on the sixth day, on his birthday. Some call it fate & my friends say we're star crossed, but I've never had a thing for destiny ... Something about it smells a lot like death & reality at the same time, so for the sake of my comfort I'll call it all coincidence.

14. After trying to photocopy my feelings into the body of this poem, I've created a mass of several paper planes  that are way too drenched in the sea of my emotions to fly, so instead they decompose into an ocean of confusion.

15. I don't quite know myself but I know that I'm a natural disaster, a training bonsai and a lotus rolled up in one. I have the ability to wreck things with passion, trying to understand the bends and folds of my being will take time, and ever so often do I reveal my being in the rawest of states. I'm stubborn and ambitious and real. I say whatever when I actually care, I'm weird and complicated and I think a lot.

I hope to be half the person I am today in future. Something about growing up feels a lot like loosing....souls.